In Between
by Superpotterwholockiscool
Summary: We all know what happenned in 'The Angels Take Manhattan'. What we don't know is the Doctor's thoughts through the episode. The Doctor's POV. One-shot. Mild 11/River slash. Amy/Rory as presented in the episode. COMPLETE.


In between

Everything was fine. Everything was more than fine. Everything was brilliant. At first.

They were having a nice day off, reading, having a picnic, talking, laughing. Amy and Rory were doing the kissing thing again.

He was happy, seeing both his Ponds so careless, so free, so safe.

And then it all started to go downhill. Who would've thought? The Angels take Manhattan.

No one would've believed him. Who could have predicted that? No one.

He should've.

It was supposed to be a nice day, without the usual danger and the running.

He couldn't save Rory. Even he, who could turn armies around at the mention of his name. The Oncoming Storm, the Last of the Time Lords, Time Lord Victorious, the Predator. He couldn't save his glorious Pond.

But Amy could. Amelia Pond, with her name from a fairy tale. She could save Rory.

And she did.

But he was so afraid, so afraid to let her try.

-What the Hell are you doing?!

What if the paradox didn't work? What if it failed, and they died. My Ponds, dead. I would be left alone.

But it worked.

-What's happening?

-The paradox. It's working. The paradox is working!

It worked. They were fine.

-I could have lost you both.

But here they were, his Ponds, in his arms. They were hugging, and he was overwhelmed with happiness, but also understanding. He understood that this might have been _it_. He could have lost them, for real. He could have lost _everything_.

-Don't. Ever. Do that. Again.

So happy. So relieved. He couldn't help but shake still at the mere thought of losing them, but he was smiling. And bickering with River.

Everything was fine. Everything was more than fine. Everything was brilliant!

Amy and Rory fixed it. They solved the problem.

Afterwards, he thought he should have expected it. The Universe was only too keen to play games with him. Everything was too brilliant to be true. Miracles don't happen that often.

Why did he enter the TARDIS first? Why didn't he wait for the Ponds to go in first? They would've been safe inside.

He always did that. One of his rules stated it clearly.

For their safety, the companions enter the TARDIS first.

He was too happy, too relieved, too overwhelmed, and he didn't let them enter first.

He was in the TARDIS when he heard Amy.

-What?

And then:

-Doctor!

-What the Hell did _that_ come from? He barely registered River saying.

All he heard was the suddenly erratic beating of his hearths. Tu-tu-tu-thump. Tu-tu-tu-thump. Tu-tu-tu-thump. Tu-tu-tu-thump. All he knew was the panic, the gut seizing, overwhelming notion of loss.

-It's a survivor. Very weak, but keep your eyes on it!

-Where's Rory?

Tu-tu-tu-thump.

Rory.

Tu-tu-tu-thump.

The Angel. Standing there. _Smiling._

Tu-tu-tu-thump.

The grave.

In loving memory

Rory Arthur Williams

Aged 82

Tu-tu-tu-thump.

The understanding. He failed them. He failed River, he failed Rory and he failed _Amy_.

It was all his fault.

Tu-tu-tu-thump.

-I'm sorry.

Tu-tu-tu-thump.

The pain. The realisation.

Tu-tu-tu-thump.

-Amelia, I'm so, so sorry.

His previous face only said that when he realised he couldn't save someone. Only at the worst imaginable situation.

This situation was so grave that he said them. Those words.

I'm so, so sorry.

And he was.

He was so, so sorry.

All his fault. Always his fault.

Didn't he ever learn?

-No. No, we can just get him in the TARDIS. One more paradox…!

She didn't want to believe it.

Tu-tu-tu-thump.

-…would rip New York apart!

-That's not true, I don't believe it.

-Mom, but it's true. River said.

Her voice was broken.

Tu-tu-tu-thump. Tu-tu-tu-thump. Tu-tu-tu-thump. Tu-tu-tu-thump.

Her eyes.

The look in her eyes as she understood. As she realised they couldn't save Rory.

Tu-tu-tu-thump.

The pain. The loss. The sorrow. The anger. The decision.

Tu-tu-tu-thump. Tu-tu-tu-thump.

He wanted to look away. He couldn't bear to see her like that. His Pond, his little Amelia Pond. But he couldn't look away.

-Amy? What are you doing?

-That gravestone, Rory's, there's room for one more name, isn't there?

Tu-tu-tu-thump.

NO!

-What are you talking about?! Back away from the Angel, come back to the TARDIS, we'll figure something out!

He grabbed her hand, but she took it away from his.

-The Angel, would it send me to the same time, to him?

Tu-tu-tu-thump.

NO!

-I don't know! Nobody knows! He lied.

He couldn't. He wouldn't. He lost Rory. He won't lose her too!

-But it's my best chance, yeah?

Amy, NO!

Tu-tu-tu-thump.

-NO!

-Doctor, shut up! Yes, yes it is!

River, please, NO!

She was smiling. And the Angel was smiling.

Tu-tu-tu-thump.

And his hearths were breaking.

-Amy…!

-Well then, I just have to blink, right?

-NOO!

Why? Why to him? Why?

-It'll be fine! I know it will! I-I'll be with him, like I should be. Me and Rory, together.

Tu-tu-tu-thump. Tu-tu-tu-thump.

-Melody?

-Stop it, just stop it!

River please! Amy, please! Stop. Just… just stop…

Tu-tu-tu-thump.

He turned towards River.

''Please, no'' Was all he could think.

She took Amy's hand. One last time.

NO!

-Look after him. And you be a good girl, and look after him.

Amy, no.

River kissed her mother's hand. One last time.

-You're creating fixed time. I will never be able to see you again!

Amy, don't do this to me! Please, River!

-I'll be fine, Amy cried. I'll be with him, she hiccupped.

-Amy, please, just, come back into the TARDIS.

Tu-tu-tu-thump.

One last time.

-Come along, Pond. _Please_.

Tu-tu-tu-thump.

Was that a nod? Please, Amy, please.

One last time.

Tu-tu-tu-thump.

-Raggedy man…

Tu-tu-tu-thump.

-…goodbye!

NOOOOOOOO!

No.

No.

Tu-tu-tu-thump.

The Angel wasn't smiling anymore. As if it understood. As if it could understand the pain he felt. As if it could see his hearths being torn apart. As if it could understand what it meant to die. Because that's what it felt like. He was dying, slowly, painfully, as if someone ripped from his chest and shattered every little piece of his already too broken hearts.

In loving memory

Rory Arthur Williams

Aged 82

And his loving wife

Amelia Williams

Aged 87

All that pain.

He just… he just wanted to rip the Angel apart. He would've done it if it brought him back Amy and Rory.

The grave.

The Angel.

River, beside him.

Always there. River.

-They were your parents. Sorry. Didn't even think.

All the _pain_.

She was trying to help.

Oh, _River_! Even though she was just as hearths-broken as he was, she stayed strong. His River.

Always there for him.

Never has he felt such hatred for humans.

All those humans, living in New York, so naïve, so ignorant, so ingrate. If it wasn't for them, he would've gone back and saved his Ponds. No second thoughts. But he swore to protect them from all threats.

He was a threat himself.

-I'll tell you to write an afterword. For you. Maybe you'll listen to her.

All the pain. His fault. Always his fault.

All the _PAIN_.

And then the realisation.

Afterword. Amy. Write. Book. Last page.

The page.

Afterword, by Amelia Williams.

Hello old friend. And here we are. You and me, on the last page. By the time you read this words, Rory and I will be long gone. So know that we lived well, and were very happy. And above all else, know that we will love you. Always. Sometimes I do worry about you though. I think, once we're gone, you won't come back here for a while. And you might be alone. Which you should never be. Don't be alone, Doctor. And do one more thing for me. There's a little girl waiting in a garden. She's going to wait a long while, so she's going to need a lot of hope. Go to her. Tell her a story. Tell her that, if she's patient, the days are coming that she'll never forget. Tell her she'll go to see and fight pirates. She'll fall in love with a man who'll wait two thousand years to keep her safe. Tell her she'll give hope to the greatest painter who ever lived. And save a whale in outer space. Tell her, this is the story of Amelia Pond. And this is how it ends.


End file.
